Tighten

There is no The Easter Beagle.

There is no The Great Pumpkin or Samantha Claus.

And there is no The Christmas Queen.

This is a real world, and you kids need to wake up!

There is no gummy bear house.

There is no monster.

And there is no unicorn.

This is a real world, and you need to wake up!

1. Death

2. Lord Shen

3. Grimmel the Grisly

4. Tai Lung

5. King Rameses II

6. Fairy Godmother

7. "Big" Jack Horner

8. Tighten

9. Pitch Black

10. Lord Farquaad

11. Kai the Collector

The ginger haired man skulked through the streets of Metropolis, wearing a trench coat and hat to mask his identity, with an emoji badge. He had been tasked with traveling to the city to discover some Secret Identities, as he had been unable to recover them. As such, he had been sent to rediscover them. He would feel annoyed at having to do this, but he had his hopes actually high, feeling confident that he would succeed in this mission of his, as he had been partnered with-

"And then I EXPLODED with Goo and candy. It was pretty epic but it still really hurt!” Gargaroth the Devourer waved his hands above his head and made explosion sounds with his horrible voice.

Hal Stewart, also known as Tighten, chuckled at the story.

"Okay the insane luck of that cat throwing the Lollipop in your mouth is un freaking believable. It's crazy!”

Gargaroth crackled with his friend as he rolled on his shoulder. "Look at me man!" He grabbed his folds and shook them silly. "I'm like, the size of a Hand now."

He then quickly counted his eyes and said, "And I got 2 eyes again!"

Tighten exited the alley and saw a gas station. Knowing that he and Gargaroth were probably getting hungry after so much walking, went through the doors and started scanning the Shelves for any treat that might catch his eye.

"No. No..."

Tighten looked over, seeing another trench coated figure. A peculiar thing about her was that she wore sharp gloves. And she was shoplifting.

“Wooo she?” Gargaroth asked, sagging over Tighten’s shoulder, trying to stay out of sight.

“Don't know.”

As he said this, the woman exited the aisle and started to make her way to the door, her pockets full of food.

Tighten got some sweets and junk food to buy. He made his way to the cashier and bought half of it when-

“GGGGGAHAAAAAHHH!”

Tighten and the cashier spun to see the women in the trench coat flailing around, trying to pull something black and blobby off her chest, making disgusting sucking sounds.

“Get off you stupid-”

“Yum!”

Her hat fell off as she finally threw Gargaroth back at Tighten, who ducked as Gargaroth splatted onto the ceiling, and fell into a bucket of chips, leaving a green stain.

“Woooorhtit…”

The Woman, who was revealed to have brown eyes, skin and hair, quickly shoved her hat back on and punched into the night. After she did, the cashier grabbed the phone next to him and started punching numbers.

“What's the big deal?” Tighten asked.

“That's a wanted criminal who just escaped from prison!"

Tighten picked up Gagaroth and inserted him in his front pocket, cleaning some of the green slime.

“Really? Tell me more.”

“Well she was the evil cat burglar supervillain Catwoman. But she finally got caught and sent to prison a while ago, but it seems she escaped!”

Tighten rubbed his chin, with Gargaroth copying.

“Not for long!”

In the dark alley a few blocks away, Tighten and Gargaroth hid behind a large pile of dumpsters near a local cat shop.

“So why are we here again?” Tighten asked.

“Since she likes cats,” Gargaroth said, peaking from an old cup from the dumpster and camouflaging himself with it. “If she is a fan of cats, then she’ll be near this cat store to look at dem.”

And as he predicted, Selina Kyle walked through the doors, now wearing a hat, sweater and glasses to disguise herself. She continued until she came to a bus stop and pulled out a phone to watch.

Tighten and Gargaorth snuck up behind her, a small disc in Gargaroth’s hands. They quietly tiptoed next to her until-

Snap!

The disc quietly scanned her as she spoke into her phone, ”What?! The Goody Two Shoes and their boyfriends are attacking you with Harley!? I’ll be there in a second!”

She stood up and turned around, seeing her two spies.

“whA-? WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!”

“Smoke Bombing!”

Gargaroth barfed out a white diamond and with a quick flash, they vanished, leaving Catwoman standing there, confused.

A minute later, Tighten and Gargroth appeared two alleys down.

“Did you get the identities of the heroes?” Tighten asked, dusting his outfit.

“I did!” Gargaroth stated. He showed the tiny electronic device that had scanned her. “I copied her memories and attached a small device. It apparently scans the minds of her opponents and keeps their secret identities inside it. Once it's done, It’ll teleport back to us!”

Gargaorth climbed back on his bro’s shoulder. “What do we do now?”

Tighten reached into his large fanny pack and pulled out a large circular brown package with a label that says, “TOWNSVILLE, USA”.

“Doing what I love doing: Hurting Heroes. Wanna go to a car park to steal one?” Gargaroth jumped with excitement. “Oh BOY!”

They walked down the street with a spring in their step. “Wicked!” They said happily. “Master will be pleased!”

Hal Stewart is an Incel.

Hands Down,